欢迎来到 - 泰纳南山网 !    
当前位置: 首页 > 句子大全 > 搞笑的话 >

安慰人的搞笑的话

时间:2020-06-03 21:40 点击:
最幽默又能安慰人的一句话 1、毁灭人只要一句话,培植一个人却要千 Ju 话,请你多口下留情。 2、几乎所 You 事情都是两面性的,如只看消极的一面,心情 Zi 然会低落、郁闷。让自己换个角度,从积极的一面 Kan 待问题吧,那样会让你走出心情低谷的。 3、 Ku

最幽默又能安慰人的一句话

  1、毁灭人只要一句话,培植一个人却要千Ju话,请你多口下留情。   2、几乎所You事情都是两面性的,如只看消极的一面,心情Zi然会低落、郁闷。让自己换个角度,从积极的一面Kan待问题吧,那样会让你走出心情低谷的。   3、Kuai乐要懂得分享,才能加倍的快乐。   4、寂寞Di时候要想我,想我的时候来看我,看我的时候带水Guo,香蕉桔子和苹果,香蕉代表你疼我,桔子代Biao你想我,苹果代表你爱我。

有没有什么搞笑的笑话,安慰

  网友,请采纳一下我的问题吧!!!   1.Shuo有一只北极熊,因为雪地太刺眼了,必须要戴Mo镜才能看东西, 可是他找不到墨镜,Yu是闭着眼睛爬来爬去在地上找,爬呀爬呀,把手Jiao都爬的脏兮兮的才找到墨镜。 戴上墨镜,对着Jing子一照,这才发现:哦,原来我是一只熊Mao   3.一只北极熊孤单的呆在冰上发Dai,实在无聊就开始拔自己的毛玩,一根,Liang根,三根,最后拔的一根不剩,然后他就Leng死了。   4.从前从前有一只鸟,他每天都Hui经过一片玉米田,但是很不幸的,有一Tian那片玉米田发生了火灾,所有的玉米都变成了爆米Hua!!!小鸟飞过去以后……以为下雪,就冷死Liao。   5.小明新理了发,第二天来到学校,同学Men看到他的新发型,笑道:小明,你的头型好像个Feng筝哦!小明觉得很委屈,就跑到外面哭,Ku着哭着,他就飞起来了。   6.蜘蛛爱上了蝴蝶,Hu蝶却拒绝了它,蜘蛛问:为什么?这是为什么!Hu蝶说:我妈说了,整天在网上混的都不是好人.   7.Xia日炎炎的一天,两只香蕉走在路上。走Zai前面的香蕉突然觉得好热,他说,好热哦,我要Ba衣服脱掉。结果他就把皮给剥掉了。 结果后Mian的香蕉就跌倒了。然后脱了衣服的香蕉就变成了香Jiao干~   8.有一天,三个探险家终于寻找Dao"希望之谷",传说中,只要站在山谷边大喊心中Xiang要的东西,然后往山谷中跳下去,就会得到满坑满Gu所想要的东西。于是他们三个决定试看看。   Di一个是个色鬼,因此他大喊"女人!女人!"往下Yi跳果真有满坑满谷的美女正等着他.   第二Ge是个书呆子,喊了"书书书书书!"然后,Tiao到山谷里也得到满坑满谷的书.   第三个Shi个优柔寡断的人,左思右想总是无法决Ding自己的最爱,过了一个小时以后,他终Yu下定决心,觉得还是钞票最有用了,于是他走向Shan谷边.一不小心踢到一颗石头,他骂了一Sheng"shit!"不料一个重心不稳跌下Shan谷。   9.小明呢,就明天要考试窝,但Wan上却在看电视   小明妈妈就担心地问:Shu都看完了吗?明天要考试啊   小明就爽快地Hui答:妈,我看完了。   小明妈妈就很开心的Zan扬小明:乖,那明天你一定考得很好呢   Xiao明哭着说:妈,我是说,‘妈,我看,Wan了’。   10.熊猫深爱着小鹿,表达爱Yi时却遭到拒绝。 熊猫大吼~为什麼?这一Qie都是为什麼? 小鹿胆怯地说:我妈说了,戴墨镜De都是不良少年   11.有一天小明走Zai路上!走着走着突然觉得脚很酸!为什么会这Yang呢?因为小明踩到柠檬了!   12.汉字Dang中哪个字最酷?丁字https://zuciwang.com/酒中八仙/zaoju.shtml裤(酷)   巾”对“币”Shuo:儿啊。你戴上博士帽,也就身价百倍了。   “Chi”对“尽”说:姐姐,结果出来了。你怀的是双Bao胎。   “臣”对“巨”说:和你一样的面Ji。我却有三室俩厅。   13.某日,一Ge大学老师提问一学生,树上有十只鸟,开枪打死一Zhi,还剩几只?   学生反问:是无声手枪吗?Bu是枪声有多大?80-100分贝。在这个城市打Niao犯不犯法?不犯。您确定那只鸟真的被打死了Ma?确定。这时,老师已经不耐烦了:“,你Gao诉我还剩几只鸟就行了,OK?树上的鸟里有没有Long子?没有。有没有被关在笼子里挂在树上的?没You。边上有没有其他的树,树上还有没有其Ta的鸟?没有。如果有鸟怀孕了,算不算肚子Li的小鸟?不算。 打鸟的人眼有没有花?没有花,Jiu十只。教师已经是满头是汗,且下课铃响,但学Sheng继续问:有没有傻得不怕死的鸟?都怕死。Hui不会一枪打死两只?不会。学生满怀信心地说:,Ru果您的回答没有骗人“打死的鸟要是挂Zai树上没有掉下来,那么就剩一只,如果Diao下来,就一只不剩。老师当即口吐白沫Dao在地上!   14.一天,有人经过十字路口,Fa现一件超级恐怖的事,他发现卡卡西和孙悟Kong竟然在笑!   15.很久很久以前,有一晚,Chi塘里有三只虾,哈哈哈,一个女鬼放了一个屁Si了。   16.一个搞生物研究的女外Xing人来到地球,转了一圈后,觉得人类基Yin有不少可借鉴之处,于是她抓了个男人,Xiang把他和关于人类基因的文本资料一起带回。Ke飞船体积小,没法带他走,资料又过于庞大,不Neng一次带完。焦虑之际,飞船的电脑帮助系统道:“Zhe人身上有一根小小的棒子即可解决你所有问题……”Zhe时她才恍然大悟,笑着留着口水对那个男Ren说:“。。。。。把U盘给我!” 。   17.You一个陷儿正过马路,结果不小心被卡车压瘪了,Ta奄奄一息的时候看了看自己的身体,他说:“Yuan来我是豆沙馅儿的,不是肉馅儿的”   18.Da哥,你别在摸了!你摸了上面摸下面,毛都让你摸Diao了,这么嫩的皮,被你摸的都流水了!你让An以后怎么卖?这桃都是新鲜的,您不买就算了!   19.Cong前有只小羊,有天他出去玩,结果碰上了大灰Lang。 大灰狼说:我要吃了你!!!小羊大惊!Ni们猜,结果怎么了?结果大灰狼就把小羊吃了。   20.Cong前有个剑客,他人很冷,心很冷,剑很冷,最后Leng死了   21.从前有一只老虎在马路上追一Zhi鹿!鹿大惊于是越跑越快,最后就变成了高速公路   22.You一个西红柿,被石头拌了一跤吧嗒摔烂了,又有Yi个西https://zuciwang.com/疚惡/default.shtml红柿吧嗒又摔烂了,还有一个西红柿吧Zuo吧嗒吧嗒吧嗒吧嗒无数个西红柿摔烂了最后一个Xi红柿也摔倒了啊嗒耶!番茄酱耶!   23.士兵Wen连长:作战时踩到地雷咋办?连长大为恼火:Kao,能咋办?踩坏了照价赔偿。   24.Yi天,三只小猪为了躲避大灰狼的追赶,而建造了San个小屋。大灰狼不费劲的吹毁了草屋,木屋,砖屋,San只小猪们拼命的跑,但是还是被大灰狼追上了。San只小猪绝望地说,你看着办吧。我们放弃Liao,随你怎样。此时,大灰狼奸笑着,留着口水说:Na快告诉我小红帽在哪里?   25.大象把大Bian排在路中央,一只蚂蚁正好路过,它抬头望Liao望那云雾缭绕的顶峰,不禁唱到:呀啦Suo,这就是青藏高原!~~~~   我打了Hen久的,采纳一下吧!   1 say to have a polar bear, because the snow is too dazzling, must wear sunglasses to see things, but he could not find his glasses, then closed his eyes to climb on the ground, climb up, the hands and feet up the dirty to find sunglasses. Wear a pair of sunglasses, a mirror to shine, it found that: Oh, I'm a panda   3 a polar bear to stay alone in a daze ice, really boring started pulling their hair, one, two, three, the last one left, and then he cold dead.   4 once upon a time there lived a bird, he every day through a corn field, but unfortunately, a fire one day the cornfield, all corn into popcorn!!! The bird flew past later...... That the snow, cold dead.   5 Xiao Ming Li of the new hair, the second day came to the school, the students saw his new hairstyle, smiles: Xiao Ming, your head like a kite oh! Xiao Ming feel wronged, they ran out crying, crying tears, he would fly up.   6 spider fell in love with the butterfly, butterfly refused it, spider ask: why? This is why! Butterfly said: my mom said, mixing all day on the Internet are not good   The 7 summer day, two bananas walk on the road. Walk in front of the banana suddenly feel very hot, he said, good hot Oh, I want to take your clothes off. He put the skin to peel away. Results fell behind the banana. Then undressed banana becomes dried banana   8 one day, three explorer finally find the "valley of hope", according to legend, just stand in the valley edge shouting what you want, then jump into Valley in large numbers, get what you want. So the three of them decided to try to have a look.   The first is a goat, so he shouted, "a woman! The woman! "There was a jump down in large numbers beauty waiting for him   The second is a nerd, shouted "book book book book book! "Then, jumping into the valley has been in large numbers of books   The third is a person always irresolute and hesitant, think of this way and that is not for them to decide the most love, an hour later, he finally determined, feel or money is the most useful, so he went to the valley edge. Accidentally kicked a stone, he scolded "shit! "But an unstable center of gravity down the valley.   9 Xiaoming, will have an exam tomorrow nest, but the night was to watch TV   Xiao Ming mother asked: books are finished? Have an exam tomorrow   Xiaoming readily replied: Mom, I finished.   Xiao Ming mother very happy praise Xiaoming: good, that tomorrow you will do a good job   Xiao Ming cried and said: Mom, I said, 'Mom, I see,.'.   The 10 panda love deer, expression love but was rejected. The panda roar ~ why? All this is why? The fawn timidly say: my mother said, wearing sunglasses is bad boy   11 one day Xiaoming go on the road! Walked suddenly feel the foot is very acid! Why? Because he stepped on a lemon!   Among the 12 Chinese characters which word is the coolest? G-string (cool)   Towel "to" money "says: my son. You wear a doctor cap, also have a sudden rise in social status.   "Rule" to "do" said: the elder sister, the results come out. You are carrying twins.   "I" to "giant" said: and you have the same area. I have 3 rooms two hall.   13 one day, a university teacher asked a student, there are ten birds in the tree, shot and killed one, how many are left?   The students asked: is the silent pistol? No gunshots have how old? 80-100 db. Hits the bird in this city to violate the law? Don't make. Are you sure that bird was killed? Determine. At this time, the teacher was already impatient: ", you told me a few birds left to go, OK? There is no deaf birds on the tree? No. There is no was shut in a cage hanging in the trees? No. There is no other tree, the tree has no other bird? No. If the birds were pregnant, calculate do not calculate in the belly of a bird? Don't count. Human bird have flowers? No flower, have ten only. The teacher was already sweating, and finishes class the bell sound, but the students continue to ask: is there any silly not afraid dead birds? All fear death. Will not shoot two? Can't. Students with full confidence, said: if you answer no lie "killed if the bird hanging did not fall in the tree, then remains one, if you fall, does not remain. The teacher was foaming at the mouth and fell to the ground!   The 14 day, people pass the crossroads, found a super bloodcurdling thing, he found that Kakashi and Sun Wukong even in laughter!   15 a long time ago, one night, there are only three shrimp pond, ha ha ha, a ghost put a fart die.   16 a biological study of female aliens came to earth, a circle, think the human gene has many lessons, she caught a man, want to put him back in and about human gene text data. But its small size, don't take him away, data too large, not a band. The anxiety, the ship's computer help system way: "this person has a small stick can solve all of your problems......" Then she could see light suddenly, smile and keep slobber said to the man:"..... The U disk to me!".   17 there is a depression, crossing the road, was accidentally truck tyre, be at one's last gasp when he looked at his body, he said: "I was sweetened bean paste stuffing, not the meat stuffing"   The 18 eldest brother, you don't touch! You touch touch the hair above, let you feel lost, so tender skin, be felt by you running water! You let me how to sell? This peach is fresh, you do not buy it!   19 once upon a time there was little sheep, one day he went out to play, the results hit the big bad wolf. The wolf said: I want to eat you!!! The big surprise! Guess what, result how? Results the wolf ate the lamb.   20 once upon a time there was a swordsman, he is very cold, cold heart, sword is cold, the cold dead   21 once upon a time there was a tiger chasing a deer in the street! The deer was surprised and ran faster and faster, finally becomes a freeway   22 there is a tomato, was stone mix of Bata broken, and a tomato kipper and broken, and a tomato TA TA TA TA TA countless tomatoes smashed. Finally a tomato fell Ah Da! Tomato sauce!   23 the commander of the soldiers asked: Combat stepped on landmines? Even grew up as the angry: depend, can do? Trampled the compensation.   The 24 day, the three little pigs to avoid the wolf's pursuit, and built three cabin. The wolf not laborious blow ruined grass, wood, brick house, the three little pigs are desperately run, but was caught up with the wolf. The three little pigs desperate to say, you do it. We give up, whatever you do. At this time, the wolf crafty smile, keep slobber said: please tell me where is the Little Red Riding Hood?   25 elephants in the stool Pai Road Central, one of ants is pass by, the peak, it looked to the cloud can not help but sing: ah cable, this is the Qinghai Tibet plateau! ~ ~ ~ ~

用幽默搞笑的话安慰心情不好的人
数据统计中,请稍等!
顶一下
(0)
0%
踩一下
(0)
0%
------分隔线----------------------------